Sweet Transvestite

"Sweet Transvestite" follows "The Time Warp" on Second Saturday as part of the Rocky Horror Picture Show festivities at Lancaster. In 2012, this was been replaced by "Over at the Frankenstein Place" for first session, and "Science Fiction/Double Feature" for second session. In 2013, first session used "Hot Patootie (Bless My Soul)."

Lyrics

[Frank]: How d'you do, I see you've met my faithful handyman.
He's just a little brought down because when you knocked
He thought you were the candyman.
Don't get strung out by the way that I look,
Don't judge a book by its cover.
I'm not much of a man by the light of day,
But by night I'm one hell of a lover.

I'm just a Sweet Transvestite from Transexual, Transylvania.

So let me show you around, maybe play you a sound.
You look like you're both pretty groovy.
Or if you want something visual that's not too abysmal,
We could take in an old Steve Reeves movie.

[Brad]: I'm glad we caught you at home, could we use your phone?
We're both in a bit of a hurry.

[Janet]: Right!

[Brad]: We'll just say where we are, then go back to the car.
We don't want to be any worry.

[Frank]: So you got caught with a flat, well, how about that?
Well babies, don't you panic.
By the light of the night, it'll all seem alright.
I'll get you a satanic mechanic.

I'm just a Sweet Transvestite from Transexual, Transylvania.

So why don't you stay for the night? Or maybe a bite?
I could show you my favorite obsession.
I've been making a man with blond hair and a tan,
And he's good for relieving my tension.

I'm just a Sweet Transvestite from Transexual, Transylvania.
Hey, Hey, I'm just a Sweet Transvestite from Transexual, Transylvania.

[Frank]: So come up to the lab. And see what's on the slab.
I see you shiver with antici...
[Audience]: Say it! Say it, Master!
[Frank]: ...pation!
[Audience]: What's masterpation?
[Frank]: But maybe the rain isn't really to blame
[Audience]: Unless we're in Mayser! or Yes it is!
[Frank]: So I'll remove the cause...
[Audience]: What about the symptom?
[Frank]: ...but not the symptom.