# Difference between revisions of "Memories:LAN"

## 2004.1

### The Most Adoptions Ever

Zev Hurwich currently holds the unchallenged record for being adopted 42 times in his squirrel year. The idea for this started due to his seeming dual adoption, first by Alexia Simmonard, and then by Jeremy Berkowitz. Zev and Jeremy discussed the possibility of being adopted more than once which led to the idea of being adopted 42 times. Zev and Jeremy, in the last week of 04.1, ran around the campus asking people to adopt Zev. The entire Alcove of 04.1 ended up adopting him, plus other random people around the site, leading to a final tally of 42 adoptions.

## 2005.1

In Dan Salvato's Math Logic class in 2005.1, one of his friends noticed that Dan's shoulders were slouched down all the time. She brought it up with him, saying "Put your shoulders up, like this." Dan took note of this.

A year later, just before 2006.1, someone in school told Dan he had good posture. Dan was like "o.o" and then he was like ":D".

### Holding the Door for 500 People

Dan Salvato and his friend Luyu were bored one day and they were sitting in the Schnader stairwell, between the front and back doors, just lightly talking. Noticing the many people walking in and out, Dan and Luyu began holding doors open for people. Dan couldn't help but notice that only certain people said "thank you" as they opened the door - this made him curious, and he decided to get creative.

Dan and Luyu relocated to the door coming in from Schnader porch, and their friend Andrey decided to join them. Together, the three of them held the door for anyone entering while counting each person who walked through; they also counted the number of "thank yous" received. Out of the 500 people they held the door open for, they received 255 "thank yous" - that's 55 percent. They also created a set of rules determining who says "thank you" and how it is said:

• RAs are much more likely to say "thank you" than students.
• Females are more likely to say "thank you" than males. This applies for students and RAs.
• If the walker is familiar with the door holder, he/she is less likely to say "thank you."
• People in a small group are unlikely to say "thank you" unless one person says it; in this case, the rest of the small group usually says "thank you" as well.
• People are more likely to say "thank you" if they witness the door holder opening the door.
• Unless a female RA, walkers are likely to say "thank you" quietly.
• Small groups are more likely to say "thank you" than large groups.
• Female RAs are most likely to smile when saying "thank you."

### Change of Heart

Dan Salvato, the Son of the Holy Trinity in 2008.1, was ironically as non-traditionalist as possible during his first year in 2005.1. He had come to CTY during the lowest point of his three-year depression; he felt that CTY would give him a chance to start his life over with new people. Dan was generally happy at CTY, staying inside during dances to play cards and spending every Quad Time in his hall. However, his depression still affected him; he sometimes felt like everyone cared about each other more than Dan. Feeling that CTY was nothing special for him, he decided not to return the next year. He told this to his friend Ly, who was disappointed.

Because of a thunderstorm on the day of the last dance, all students were required to report to the ASFC, which Dan was unhappy about. However, he managed to play cards with his friends against the wall, despite the blaring Canon songs in the background. Eventually, though, Dan's card-playing friends dispersed, and Dan was left alone to sit against the wall. Nightswimming began to play, and Dan was terribly upset - he was all alone again, just like at home. But then he felt a tap on his shoulder. He looked up to see Artem, a onemore in his hall with a wonderful heart. He asked Dan what was wrong, only to get a shrug in return. Artem then said to Dan, "Hey, if there's something bothering you, you can always come to me to talk about it, and I'll be here to listen. I care about you, I want you to know that." A pat on the shoulder, and Artem was off.

This single trigger caused Dan to reconsider what he had so stubbornly been so sure of for the past three years. He realized that maybe there were people out there - people who could care and listen; people who could love. After a lot of self-debate, Dan replaced each negative thought of his with something positive and motivational. His depression was over. On the last day, when Ly asked Dan to sign her shirt, Dan happily obliged and wrote his name, and underneath his name, a message: "I'll be back."

## 2006.1

### The Forty Two Person Grass Orgy

In Lancaster 06.1 during the first week of CTY when hand holding was still considered quite promiscuous Teh Corner decided to start a grass orgy. They had already been reprimanded for similar conduct but they hoped that they could get away with it. Then realizing that the more people who joined the orgy the less likely they were to get into trouble so members of Teh Corner kept inviting random people to join the orgy. When the orgy had past around 23 people the idea came into the minds of those present to achieve a forty two person grass orgy. Within a few minutes they had achieved the ultimate grass orgy and not a single one got yelled at by any member of staff.

### Evil Vending Machine

One weekend, Dan Salvato and a few friends in his hall were bored. As all bored people do, they began climbing on top of the vending machine in their kitchen. Wondering if it was light enough to move, about five people positioned themselves around the vending machine. To their surprise, they managed to move it! Having fun with the whole situation, they pushed it in front of the doorway, blocking entrance to the kitchen. They wanted to give the vending machine a more menacing look, so they gave it an angry face made out of duct tape. The evil vending machine remained in place for several hours.

RA Jeff was walking down the hall when something red caught his eye. Turning left, he found himself face-to-face with a vending machine, smiling at him mischeivously. He stood there for about five seconds, smiling to himself, before saying "Okay, can you guys move it back now?"

The vending machine became the basis of the signature panels in the 2006 yearbook for both Etse's and Jeff's halls. (If you have a 2006 yearbook, check it out!) Here is a photo of the vending machine.

## 2006.2

### Sexapussy (The Sexapus)

During Second Saturday of 2006.02, Crafting the Essay 3C student Ashok was getting bored as the day was dragging on to around 4:00, the end of the activities. Hallmate Greg Lawrence IV had had some twisty balloons mailed to him, and Ashok had collected 2 balloons so far that Greg had left lying around, presumed to be broken. Upon returning to his room, Ashok suddenly had an idea: he would make a balloon octopus! Quickly, Ashok scoured the hall for 2 more balloons. Alas, he only found one more, but not to be deterred, he used the 3 balloons he had to make a six-armed octopus. And thus Sexapussy, The Sexapus, was born.

Ashok took the Sexapus to the 3rd Dubbs lounge, which was at the top floor of South Ben and very hot. As the people in the lounge started playing with Sexapussy, a few were interested in how slowly it fell. Noticing that there were several fans cooling the room, Ashok and RA Adam Roush set up 3 fans pointing upwards and dropped Sexapussy into the current. For the next half-hour or so, Sexapussy would float to the top of the room, then flip and fall, then flip and spin around several times while catching the air currents and floating upwards again. In summary, it would float, flip, and spin without touching the ground for several minutes at a time, and it looked really cool. Word of the Sexapus got around quickly, and many people came up to 3rd Dubbs to see the balloon creature. Unfortunately, someone jostled one of the fans before a good video could be taken, and it couldn't be put quite in the same position so that the Sexapus would float as long again. Later, Adam and some others tied inflated plastic bags onto 3 of Sexapussy's 6 arms, which made it float much slower and longer.

Sexapussy suffered the same unfortunate fate that all balloons must, unfortunately, but plans for a bigger setup are under way.

P.S. we all secretly (or not so secretly) want to have the sexapussy's babies. its true. ~Yulia speaking for all of CTY who witnessed the glory that was Sexapussy.

Years later, a live "hexapus" was found in a British aquatic zoo.

### The Legend of The Ivan

For those of you who don't know (i.e. those of you who weren't in Archaeology or Advanced Chem 06.2), this is the legend of The Ivan, collaborate on by Lena and AmanDaray (Amanda Ray).

It unfolds thusly: Soon after arrival at CTY, Amandar and Lena conversed and became friends. Of the myriad unusual and nerdy things discussed, the subject soon veered towards sex, drugs, communists and other such risque business (as CTY conversations have a knack for doing). Amandar brought forth the idea of locating an individual on campus to stalk for the remainder of the session, an idea that was met with enthusiasm from the not yet "attached-at-the-hip-and-left-knee-to-Kib" [The origin of this quotation remains uncertain] Lena. Walking past the arches, Lena spotted a more than adequate stalkee and rushed to inform Amandar of the charming new development.

The two giddily overeager students and some friends they told about the stalkee stared at, "casually" walked by, and giggled uncontrollably at and around him for excessive amounts of time. He was of slim build, dark hair, and pasty complexion. On some occasions, he wore grey Asics of the same style as Lena's. He was often seen carrying an "indie" messenger bag and reading books while eating meals instead of socializing, like an "emo" student would. He often appeared very pensive and existential (if it is possible for one to look existential). He had a Russian look about him, and was soon dubbed a communist. At breakfast, Lena once remarked that he looked as if he should be at a coffee shop or vintage record store "like, in Belgium or somewhere!" which prompted the notion that he was a stereotypical Kerouac-esque beat traveler, and all of his books were written by Nietzsche, Camus, Ginsberg, and Palahniuk. Upon writing a report on fourteenth-century Russia in class, Lena researched Ivan the Terrible and immediately decided that the stalkee's name must be Ivan, Nikolai, Sven, or "something swanky like that." Ivan was preferred by Amandar and the matter was settled.

At first, since he was too old to be a camper, and looked too mystical and worldly to be a TA or teacher (and obviously wasn't an RA), Amandar was misled to believe that he was a random F&M college student crashing CTY meals for unknown, mysterious reasons. Soon thereafter, one of the CTYers involved in the stalkage discovered that he did, in fact, have a black lanyard. This prompted Amandar to drag a whining Lena to the bulletin board outside the Nurse's office in Thomas where the pictures of RAs and TAs were posted. To both girls' dismay, the elusive stalkee's picture was ripped from the board, probably by a first session CTYer. They did, however, discover his real name, Nicolas (surprisingly close to Nikolai!), and that he TAed MIND B.

By the third week, Ivan probably was well aware that he was being stalked, especially since an involved CTYer, Kristin, decided to approach him and strike up a conversation which promptly failed. Lena had kind of forgotten about him by this point, but Amandar was still recruiting stalkers to join the rapidly growing cult of Ivanites. She hopes Ivan will return next year so the tradition can be passed on, but they probably freaked him out too much, in addition to everyone in MIND B. Apparently, no one in MIND B had caught on that their TA was being stalked by everyone in ARCH, CHEM, and a few random people from paleo and other classes.

Here is a strategically taken picture of Ivan and Amandar's shoulder by another A-Chem student:

Jeff Sachs says:

``` As a member of Mind B. I am completely shocked that people were stalking Nicolas "Fries"
Friesner. Although I did read some interesting Dr. Uffy, Fries, Lectern, fanfics...
```

Laney Newhouse says:

``` DO NOT LISTEN TO JEFF SACHS. THAT IS A LIE. THERE WAS NO FANFICTION WRITTEN ABOUT DR. UFFIE, FRIES
OR THE LECTERN, AND CERTAINLY NOT ABOUT THE THREE OF THEM ENGAGING IN ILLICIT ACTIVITIES TOGETHER.
However, I, too, am very much amused by the stalkage of our beloved TA, and would like to note that
a lot of members of our class stalked him as well, as they found him quite attractive and soulful.
```

Amanda Ray says:

``` 'Twas the great Amandar herself who discovered the black lanyard, silly Lena.
```

### Waffle House

On the last day of CTY, two CTY'ers, Harrison and Jordan, thought it would be a good idea to go to the Waffle House on Harrison's last day at CTY. The plan was to sneak out and leave the exterior door to the dorm building propped open with a flip flop (as they had already returned their key fobs). They made it past Turkey Hill and into the Waffle House, where they had a lovely breakfast, and stopped at a convenience store to buy some disallowed caffeinated products (an energy drink and caffeinated gum). They then attempted to call their dorm neighbor, Andrew, from a payphone, but he wasn't awake. On their way back, they were stopped by the Lancaster police for being out past curfew. After trying unsuccessfully to pass themselves off as townies, they were carted back to F&M, where they were summarily grilled about what exactly they had done. While the administration couldn't do much to Harrison, as he was a nomore and it was the last day of the session, Jordan was not allowed to come back for his nomore year.

### D-Qwon

D-Qwon (the hyphen is important because otherwise one may think it's pronounced "deh-qwon") is a lamppost at Lancaster, closest to North Ben, and near the arches.

CTYers mainly in Crafting the Essay B and C spent their Quad Times of the first week of LAN.06.2 basking in its light before realizing that... well, lampposts have feelings too. It was then that Johnny Mondel named the lamppost D-Qwon and, through some telepathic means, learned of his life. D-Qwon and his brother Dupree [whose body lay dying during 06.2, but has since been buried] were inner city lampposts who set out on a journey to Lancaster. D-Qwon, being the luckier brother, arrived on the Franklin & Marshall campus alive, but Dupree didn't have the same fate and was destroyed by the construction of Ware.

On the first weekend in 06.2, with he help of Ellie Kladky's iPod speakers, the first D-Qwon Dance Party occurred, in which people sat around, listened to music, and of course, danced. Following this first D-Qwon Dance Party, any weekend time these CTYers spent hanging out and dancing to music, regardless of the place on the Quad, became known as a D-Qwon Dance Party.

It is believed by many that the drawing on the back of the LAN 06.2 "year"book is of D-Qwon.