User:Paul Garrity Jr.
My name is actually Adam Garrity. My true title is: Paul Garrity Jr. Son of Savages, Forger of Trap Swords, Squire to Trap Lord II JR, Winner of Student-Staff Games.
Passionfruit Speech 16.2
Hi y'all I want to take the time to talk about something near and dear to my heart as all of you have been doing for the past speeches. I of course am not talking about CTY, I am talking about Paul Garrity, the man the Myth the legend. For those of you who don't know Paul Garrity then listen up you are about to witness the most savage man who has ever existed. Now as I only have one minute I am simply going to give an example of two of Paul Garrity's absolute savageness.
(This is an actual conversation I had with Paul Garrity)
"I hear you just ate a Vervomiter" -Paul Garrity
"Yes" -Adam Garrity
"I scream, you scream, we all scream for ice cream. Hope the pain was worth the gain."
"Well, I did better than Duncan and Avi at eating my Vermonster so there's that."
"At least it wasn't tequila shots."
"Well, there's that as well."
Now would be a good time to announce to you that my actual name is Paul Garrity Jr. but until I created he trap sword in the fires of wilmarth I was not worthy of the name. But now I have been given the trap lords grace and I will now and forever take my true name as Paul Garrity Jr. Now I think we can all appreciate how amazing this man is, but in addition there are certain quirks about him that you must know. If you ever talk to Paul Garrity you must always refer to him as Paul Garrity, never as Paul or as Mr. Garrity as that would be disrespectful to his memory. Paul Garrity is my literal father not my metaphorical father but my literal father. If you guys should be happy about anything regarding the end of CTY it should be about the chance that has been presented to you to meet Paul Garrity. When he meets you he will probably be confused as to why the entire camp wants to meet him but even if he doesn't say it I can assure you that Paul Garrity does in fact think you're a savage. In particular Di, she asked me to say that.
I love CTY and I love the Passionfruit
