User:The Great White Charlene

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Good [current approximate time of day], [denotation of gender and/or species], and welcome to my page. I hope this interests [second person pronoun of choice], and should it not, I'm sorry for any [precise description of viewer's adverse symptoms] that may-

Okay, that's a horrible way to begin a biographical article. Retry.

Howdy there, and welcome to the Great White Charlene's lair! Here is where the Charlene keeps all of its most sordid and personal affects, and-

Nope, not a tour guide either. Stop that. Long-winded?

Salutations and felicitations upon you, electronic viewer of these very words, and I welcome and grant gratitude unto you for desiring to descend upon my oh-so-humble abode-

Blast, that's just annoying. And a bit too honest. I guess gimmicks are bad ideas. Normal!

Hello, and welcome to The Great White Charlene's User page. I'm TGWC, more popularly known as Cassidy, and probably possessing a few other nicknames it's not really my job to remember. I was a Lancastrian, Session Two, for four years, from 2006 to 2009, and didn't do much of anything in the meantime. Plainly, that hasn't stopped my from making a user page, which is perhaps not a good thing? You're not foreign! maybe a bit conceited, but I think we'll get through it. However, my lack of material, owing to laziness and lack of interesting accomplishments, is a bit of a damper on making an interesting article. I'm friends of a sort with a number of more important people whose user pages you should probably be reading instead are good and worth checking out because they are cool. I am adequately described as pudgy, jolly, caring, lazy, pensive, epigrammatic, long-haired, pleochroitic-eyed (pending ruling on poetic use of the term "pleochroism"), pedantic, and pretty darned strange. Big words are cool! The internet fascinates me, its inhabitants intrigue me, and its uses beguile me, so I spend a lot of time reading articles at random. Enjoy finding me, though, because I have put here NO CONTACT INFORMATION. BWAHAHAHA!

Okay, I'm on Facebook as Cassidy Stevens. But no more, got it?

Cool. Now go be awesome somewhere else.

Why aren't there any LAN 09.2 Memories?