Farmers Market

From RealCTY
Jump to navigation Jump to search

The Farmers Market is actually the Central Market situated in the center of Lancaster City. It is a place where CTYers buy fudge, ice cream, smoothies, fruits, wheat products (e.g., bread, pastries), etc., none of which, in any way, contain peanuts. The fudge, which is made by the Pennsylvania Fudge Company, is probably the most well-known and popular product in the Farmers Market, as CTYers often visit the Farmer's Market only for the purpose of buying fudge. Unfortunately, buying fudge is now sometimes banned as of 2015 because of peanut risk. The Farmers Market is within 30-45 minutes walking distance (1.36 miles) from the F&M campus.

The Farmers Market also sells non-food items, like souvenir plates with the text "Squirrel Crossing" or "In heaven there is no beer, that's why we drink it here," and the like. There are also trucker hats, keychains, and other items with the text "I Love Intercourse," which refers innocuously to the town outside of Lancaster, but the double entendre is quite obvious. Students are generally prohibited from wearing said merchandise. In the early 1990s, the Farmers Market was the best place to get large quantities of fresh flowers for cheap. Carnations were a favorite and were handed out to people on campus (reference to the line "with a pink carnation and a pickup truck" in American Pie.)

Trips to the Farmers Market are organized on First and Second Saturday mornings, but the number of trips varies every time. Sign-up sheets for the trips are normally posted in Thomas on Thursdays at Quad Time (in 08.1, the sign-up sheets were posted during the dances, leading a few Thomas residents to camp out in the lounge until the sheets were posted). Sign-up sheets are often filled very quickly, so it is wise to rush to the office after Study Hall to sign up. Advanced sign-ups might be available on Second Saturday through the RAs.

Those who sign up for later trips on Saturday may also stop by Angry, Young and Poor, the famed punk store situated in Lancaster that has sold their products worldwide through their online store.

Creative Nonfiction and Fiction and Poetry classes sometimes go to the Farmers Market to write about/stalk interesting people. Utopias and Dystopias or TOPI classes also visit to interview the Amish residents about their lifestyles.

How to Sign Up

During the first dance, an announcement is usually made about signups for Farmer's Market, which take place either under the arches during an outdoor dance, or in the corridor leading to the lobby during an indoor dance. The earliest timeslot if 7:30AM and the latest is 10:30AM. There are usually about twenty open slots for each trip, which are scheduled periodically.

Later groups have the chance to visit Angry, Young, and Poor (AYP), which is situated in Lancaster and is usually a quick walk on the way back from Farmer's Market. The store famously sells sketchy clothing often purchased for Rocky Horror performances, stripper skirts, and possibly contraband shirts.

Recommended Vendors

Pennsylvania Fudge Company - Assorted Fudge and Root Beer
Lancaster Dairy - Assorted flavored milks (orange cream, blueberry, strawberry, etc.)
Homemade jams
Fresh-baked bread
SKL (occasionally a vendor stocks the famed beverage)
The nice fig man!
A good smoothie place adjacent to the coffee place


Carol the Watermelon

On the first Saturday, a watermelon is purchased and sacrificed on the grass steps outside South Ben. Said watermelon is always named Carol. The sacrifice was first performed in 13.1 by Megan Huber, Asher Orner, Spencer McClung, Alisha Ukani, Chris Ossi and several others. The watermelon is said to contain the reincarnated fetus of Johnny Tamburro.

In 15.1, due to the rained-out Farmer's Market trip on the first Saturday and the construction around South Ben, the sacrifice was performed on Second Saturday under the Rave Tree rather than on the grass steps as in previous years.


1. While listening to the song "I Am The Anti-Pope" by Zlad, cut Carol in half with KIVO knives.
2. Continue to carve out Carol's flesh and partake of it. This may take a while. Clothes will get covered in Carol juice, so plan outfits accordingly.
3. When there are two reasonably hollow halves of Carol, fill these with any ratio of SKL, cherry soda, rainbow airheads (read: gay bacon), and/or blueberry soda.
4. Chug to heart's content.
5. When both halves have been fully sucked of juice, one may hold a funeral for Carol, which may involve dunking the halves into a trash can or throwing them on the ground and leave the smashed pieces for the squirrels.

The Eggplant

The "tradition" (don't do this if you don't feel like it, srsly, rotten eggplants are fun and great AI jokes, but equally disgusting), as established by BNI, is that during session an eggplant should be purchased and kept well past its prime.
A while after its purchase, the eggplant will begin to turn brown and feel slightly squishy. At this stage of rotting, the eggplant is to be wrapped in duct tape and kept for as long as is possible for the owner to bear.