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About Me

"But the side of you they'll never see

Is when you're left alone with the memories that

Hold your life

Together like glue"

This is the Day, The The

In my time as Jester, I hope I made you laugh. And if I didn't, I know Naomi will.

And to everyone who made my final year what it was: I like you, I love you, and forevermore I CTY you.

Hugs and SKL, Sam Schulman


//Transcribed from video: I did not write this shit in advance

//Note: My beloved father Immy went right before I did, and her speech basically took the form of shoutouts to her friends. I was one of the last ones, and she told me that I gave the best hugs and that she realized the ones we had on closing day might be the last ones we'd ever have. So I was fucking bawling, and then "oh by the way, Sam, you're up". So realize that I was breaking down for most of this.

//Also cutting out the copious amount of time at the beginning I spent trying to get my dear friends to shut the fuck up and let me do my speech

I, uh, I have one hope for this session. I hope I made you laugh. I hope that by something that I did, I was able to bring some of that happiness to your life and onto your face. And I know that if I did fail at that, I know someone who won't. And that person is Naomi.

//I give Naomi the jacket and hat and give her a hug

So, I spent my pre-passionfruit all-nighter watching Star Trek instead of writing a passionfruit speech, so I guess I'm just gonna ramble for a bit.

My first year was 16.1, and honestly, it was a terrible 3 weeks. Like I had a very bad time. And then someone, I don't remember who, someone convinced me to come to passionfruit. And I saw all the nomores who I had spent the entire session thinking were SO much cooler than me. That was like all I knew about them. I didn't know their names, I just knew they were cooler than me. I saw them giving their speeches, and I heard what this place means to them, and it convinced me to come back. It suddenly didn't matter anymore that my hall had forgotten I existed. It brought me back, and it was one of the best decisions I ever made to try this place again.

17.1 I had one of the best halls I could have asked for. I met the magnificent Nathan Burke. I started to throw myself into tradition for the first time after being the worlds largest squirrel the year before. And then 18.1 was such a weird year. 16.1 the only friend I had who wasn't actually a bad person was Tse'ela, she adopted me, and in 18.1 she dragged me into the alcove and made me talk to her friends. And it was a great time, I love all those people so much. And then to see them giving their goodbyes at passionfruit was even more powerful. I can't describe it. I'm here now at a moment that for a while I never thought I would have and over time that changed into a moment that I hoped I would never have. I'm here at the end of the tour.

//I lose all fucking composure here. I still blame Immy

And I wish I could tell you that I'm ready to leave, but I'm not. But this place is too wonderful to just leave behind. I'm gonna bring it with me, it's gonna be with me, and I'm gonna remember it.

I'm here for y'all (gesturing at my friends), and for y'all as well (gesturing to everyone else), but really for these people, my closest friends on the planet.

I want to end this with a quote from the great poet Big Audio Dynamite.

"And of all my friends, you've been the best to me. Soon will be the day, when I will pay you handsomely. Broken hearts are hard to mend, I know I've had my share. But life just carries on even when I'm not there."

I like you, I love you, I CTY you. I love CTY, and I love the passionfruit.

Courses and Sites

14.1 - CHS - Introduction to Robotics (Baby CTY)

15.1 - CHS - The Physics of Engineering (Baby CTY)

16.1 - LAN - Fast-Paced High School Biology

17.1 - LAN - Astrophysics

18.1 - LAN - Neuroscience

19.1 - LAN - Topology


jupiter. ~Sm0l

I may need to borrow it sometime. Expiration dates are more of an suggestion right??

Don't worry about it, it expires in 2023.

Now THAT is some majestic shit right there! Damn what an icon!

love you sm zestyjestyboi <3

you are the best big brother thats not related to me or older than me, ilysm ~bella

What a majestic being. So rare. Much wow. ~ Lindsey

blep - quonk bonk

I love u even tho I had to fix that hat so many times samool - quonk bonk 2 electric boogaloo

miss ya you elöngated scoundrel !

Ur a god and trust me, u made me laugh, u made me cry, and ur the best jester I'll ever meet, even though ur the only jester I ever met - Your condom dealee

love and hugs and Ceci noises - your favorite thot

i love you bitch!! i ain’t gonna ever stop loving you!! bitch!!!! - nyoom nyoom motherfucker

Hi, this is Shprinkles, blammo queen 16.1. Logging into RealCTY for the first time in maybe years, because I just wanted to say, I randomly decided to watch a few minutes of 19.1 passionfruit and long story short I'm sitting here in my apartment shedding tears in the early hours of the morning. I really appreciated your speech. I'm so glad someone made you come to 16.1 passionfruit, and so glad you kept coming back. <3 V.