Wanna buy a duck?

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"Wanna buy a duck?" is an odd game that starts with one person asking "Wanna buy a duck?" to somebody. The questioned person then responds (as in Example 1, below), and once the exchange is completed, the person who was asked asks someone else, thus forming a long chain.

This game is somewhat popular at Lancaster because of the Duck, although it was in circulation prior to the Duck's purchase. It did not include the lines "Lemme hear it quack" and "QUACK!" until after 1994. It has also spawned many spinoff games.

It is a bad idea to attempt to play with unwilling people. There have been incidences where violence has ensued from overly insistent unwise advances.


Example 1

Person 1: Wanna buy a duck?
Person 2: A what?
Person 1: A duck!
Person 2: Does it quack?
Person 1: Of course it quacks!
Person 2: Lemme hear it quack.
Person 1: QUACK!

Example 2

Person 2: Wanna buy a duck?
Person 3: A what?
Person 2: A what?
Person 1: A duck!
Person 2: A duck!
Person 3: Does it quack?
Person 2: Does it quack?
Person 1: Of course it quacks.
Person 2: Of course it quacks.
Person 3: Lemme hear it quack.
Person 2: Lemme hear it quack.
Person 1: QUACK
Person 2: QUACK
Person 3: (to another person) Wanna buy a duck?


Wanna buy an orgy?: (A what, an orgy, does it moan, of course it moans, lemme hear it moan, *insert moan here*)

Wanna buy a Dietz?: (A what, a Dietz, does it suck, of course it sucks, lemme hear it suck, tunak tunak tun tunak tunak tun tunak tunak tun da da da)

Wanna buy a Stager?: (A what, a Stager, does it hop, of course it hops, let me hear the children inside of it as it hops, whhhhAAA BUMM)

  • Refers to the frog-shaped academic building. The last response should be the sounds of the children and then the thump as the building hits the ground.

Wanna buy a Rosie?: (A what, a Rosie, is she lost, of course she's lost, lemme hear her be lost, rosssieeeeeee)

  • Refers to Rosie Brown after she disappeared during Rocky Horror practice in LAN.06.2.

Wanna buy a Noelle?: (A what, a Noelle, is she hyper, of course she's hyper, let me hear her be hyper, COFFEE COFFEE COFFEE!!)

Wanna buy an insurance policy?: (A what, an insurance policy, does it screw you over, of course it quacks!)

Wanna buy some fail?: (Some what, some fail, is it epic, of course it's epic—it's fail, lemme hear it fail, FAIL!)

Wanna buy some alternative medicine?: (Some what, some alternative medicine, does it work, of course it works, lemme hear it work, GET BACK TO WORK!)

Wanna be soooo energetic?: (How energetic?, sooo energetic, does it make me have babies, of course it makes you have babies, lemme hear how many babies, 400 BABIES!)

The transfer of Wanna buy a duck to LOS

Some PCTYDers, frustrated with the lack of tradition, decided to transfer LAN traditions over to LOS. Blammo, Silent Football, and Wanna buy a duck were transferred, to the joy of many first sessioners.

While Silent Football was not enjoyed by the second sessioners, Blammo and Wanna Buy a Duck were embraced wholeheartedly by the PCTYDers of second session, and variations were made. Some include "Wanna buy Hunter's hair?" (A what, a Hunter's hair, does it poof, of course it poofs, let me see it poof, poof), "Wanna buy a poke?" (A what, a poke, does it poke, of course it pokes, let me hear it poke, *poke*) "Wanna buy an Allegra?" (A what, an Allegra, is she inappropriate, of course she's inappropriate, let me see her be inappropriate, *shakes head*) and many others.